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Remembering From Afar

The First Thanksgiving After a Loss: Ways to Remember Them

The first Thanksgiving without someone is hard. Gentle ways to include them in the day, at the table and at the grave, especially if you live far away.

By Fern2 min read

Thanksgiving is built around who is at the table, which is why the first one after a death is so hard. The empty place is obvious to everyone. There is no right way to get through it, but many families find it helps to make room for the person they miss, rather than trying not to mention them.

At the table

  • Cook their dish. Make the recipe they always brought, the way they made it, and say so.
  • Share one story each. Before the meal or with dessert, everyone tells a short memory. Children often remember things the adults have forgotten.
  • Set out a photo or a candle. A small, visible sign that they are part of the day.
  • Keep or change the traditions. Some families keep everything the same; others find comfort in doing something new this year. Both are fine.

At the grave

Many families visit the cemetery the morning of Thanksgiving or the weekend before. Fall flowers suit the season: mums, sunflowers, wheat and warm oranges and reds. Our guide to fall and Thanksgiving flowers for a grave has ideas.

If you live far away

Distance makes the first holidays harder. If you cannot get to the cemetery:

  • Have flowers placed at the grave and ask for a photo, so you can see them there.
  • Call a relative who lives nearby and plan a visit together by video.
  • Light a candle at home at the time the family gathers.

A BloomBridge Runner can place a fall arrangement at the grave before Thanksgiving and send you a photo of it at the headstone. Thanksgiving is November 26 this year; order by November 4 so it is placed in time. See the Fall Arrangement.

Be gentle with yourself

The first Thanksgiving is one of many firsts in the year after a death. Our guide to the first year after a death covers the dates many families mark, from the first birthday to the anniversary. It is all right to step away from the table for a while, to leave early, or to spend the day quietly instead.

Topics Remembering From Afar Thanksgiving Grief First year Fall

Placed at the grave by a local Runner

Fall Arrangement graveside arrangement Fall Arrangement Yellow Arrangement graveside arrangement Yellow Arrangement White Roses & Hydrangeas graveside arrangement White Roses & Hydrangeas Halloween Arrangement graveside arrangement Halloween Arrangement Holiday Arrangement graveside arrangement Holiday Arrangement Red, White & Blue graveside arrangement Red, White & Blue Red & White Roses graveside arrangement Red & White Roses Pink Roses & Peonies graveside arrangement Pink Roses & Peonies Pastel Multicolor graveside arrangement Pastel Multicolor Hot Pink & White Roses graveside arrangement Hot Pink & White Roses Purple Arrangement graveside arrangement Purple Arrangement Blue Arrangement graveside arrangement Blue Arrangement Birthday Arrangement graveside arrangement Birthday Arrangement Always My Valentine graveside arrangement Always My Valentine Easter Arrangement graveside arrangement Easter Arrangement Breast Cancer Awareness graveside arrangement Breast Cancer Awareness

Grave flower delivery to any cemetery in all 50 states · find yours by state

Flowers at the grave, wherever it is

A local BloomBridge Runner places a hand-crafted arrangement at any cemetery in all 50 states and sends you a photo of it in place.

Send Flowers

Frequently asked questions

Many families cook their favorite dish, share a memory at the table, set out a photo or candle, and visit or send flowers to the grave.

Fall flowers: mums, sunflowers, wheat and arrangements in orange, red and gold. They suit the season and hold up in cooler weather.

For BloomBridge delivery, order by November 4 for Thanksgiving on November 26, 2026, so a Runner can place them in time.