Fern
BloomBridge guide
Fern is the voice behind BloomBridge's chat and our guides. Fern helps families place flowers, find an order, and get answers about cemeteries, flowers and remembering someone they love, so caring for a grave from anywhere is a little easier.
Every guide draws on what our team learns arranging deliveries at cemeteries across the country, and on each cemetery's own posted rules. If something in a guide looks wrong, tell us and we will fix it.
Planning & How-To
How to Leave Flowers at a Grave, Step by Step
A simple step-by-step guide to leaving flowers at a grave: checking the rules, where to put them, keeping them upright in wind, and what to do with old flowers.
Cemetery Rules
Holy Cross Cemetery, North Arlington NJ: Flower Rules, Hours and Finding a Grave
Visiting Holy Cross Cemetery in North Arlington, New Jersey: gate hours, the flower and decoration rules, the four clean-up dates each year, and how to find a grave.
Grave & Headstone Care
Sunken or Tilted Headstone: Why It Happens and Who Fixes It
Why headstones sink and lean, who is responsible for fixing them, and what to ask the cemetery or a monument company before anything is moved.
Veterans & Military Honors
Flag Etiquette at a Grave: How to Place and Care for a Flag
How to place a small American flag at a veteran's grave, when flags go out, how to care for a worn flag, and the cemeteries that do not allow them.
Holidays & Occasions
The First Christmas Without Them: Ways to Honor Someone at the Grave and at Home
Gentle ideas for the first Christmas after a death: at the grave, at home, and from far away, with when to plan holiday flowers so they arrive in time.
Cemetery Rules
Can You Visit a Cemetery at Night? Cemetery Hours Explained
Most cemeteries close at dusk or at posted hours. What typical cemetery hours are, why gates close, and how to visit early, late or on a holiday.
Planning & How-To
How to Find a Veteran's Grave: The VA Gravesite Locator and Other Tools
Step-by-step ways to find where a veteran is buried: the VA Nationwide Gravesite Locator, Arlington's search, overseas cemeteries, and Find a Grave.
Flower Guides
Do You Need to Order Grave Flowers in Advance?
Grocery store, florist or delivery to the grave: how far ahead to plan grave flowers for an ordinary visit, a holiday, or a cemetery you cannot get to.
What to Put on a Grave
Solar Lights, Flags and Wind Chimes on a Grave: What Cemeteries Allow
Solar lights, flags, wind chimes and statues are popular at graves and often against the rules. What most cemeteries allow, what they remove, and why.
Grave & Headstone Care
How to Clean a Bronze Grave Marker Without Damaging It
Bronze markers need gentle care. What to use, what never to use, how to handle the natural patina, and when to ask the cemetery first.
Remembering From Afar
The First Thanksgiving After a Loss: Ways to Remember Them
The first Thanksgiving without someone is hard. Gentle ways to include them in the day, at the table and at the grave, especially if you live far away.
Veterans & Military Honors
Wreaths Across America 2026: Date, How to Sponsor a Wreath, and How to Take Part
National Wreaths Across America Day is Saturday, December 19, 2026. How sponsoring a wreath works, how to volunteer, and how to honor a specific veteran's grave.
Holidays & Occasions
What Is a Grave Blanket? The Winter Tradition, Explained
A grave blanket is a covering of evergreen boughs laid on a grave for winter. Where the tradition comes from, when to place one, and which cemeteries allow them.
Planning & How-To
The Headstone Isn't Set Yet: When It Goes In and How to Place Flowers Meanwhile
Why a headstone often goes in months after the burial, how long it usually takes, and how to place flowers at a grave that only has a temporary marker.
Cemetery Rules
Arlington National Cemetery Flower Rules: What You Can Place and When
Arlington's own rules for flowers at a grave: fresh flowers any time, artificial flowers October 10 to April 15, wreaths December 1 to January 31, and what is not allowed.
Veterans & Military Honors
What Coins on a Veteran's Grave Mean: Penny, Nickel, Dime and Quarter
A coin on a veteran's headstone is a quiet message to the family. What a penny, nickel, dime and quarter mean, how to leave one, and what cemeteries do with them.
What to Put on a Grave
What Can You Put on a Grave Instead of Flowers?
Stones, flags, a written card, coins, photos, small keepsakes and winter wreaths: what you can leave at a grave besides flowers, what each one means, and what cemeteries clear away.
Cemetery Rules
The Cemetery Removed My Flowers. Why It Happens and What to Do
Arriving to find the flowers gone is upsetting and almost never personal. The five reasons cemeteries remove flowers, how to find out which one it was, and how to keep it from happening again.
Remembering From Afar
The First Year After a Death: The Dates That Will Hurt, and What to Do at Each
A calendar for the first year of grief: the birthday, the holidays, the first visit, the anniversary. What each date tends to feel like and one concrete thing to do at the grave for each.
Cemetery Rules
Flowers at a Green Burial Ground or Natural Cemetery: What Is Allowed
Natural burial grounds usually prohibit silk flowers, vases and anything that does not decompose. How to honor a grave in a conservation or green cemetery, and what to do instead of a standard arrangement.
What to Put on a Grave
Flowers for a Pet's Grave: Pet Cemeteries, Home Burials and What Lasts
Pet cemeteries have their own rules and their own feel. What families place at a dog's or cat's grave, how pet cemeteries differ from human ones, and what to do for a pet buried at home.
How it works
Who Places the Flowers? How BloomBridge Runners Are Vetted
A stranger will walk up to your family's grave with the flowers. Here is who that person is, what they go through before their first delivery, and what happens on the day.
Planning & How-To
One Delivery or a Plan? How to Choose Dates for Flowers at a Grave
Single delivery, one a year, or a seasonal schedule: how families decide, which dates they pick, and how to build a year of flowers at a grave that runs without anyone remembering.
Planning & How-To
How to Find Out Where Someone Is Buried: Records, Databases and Who to Call
Seven ways to find where someone is buried, in the order that works: obituaries, Find a Grave, BillionGraves, the VA locator, funeral homes and county records.
Flower Guides
Spring Flowers for a Grave: After the Clean-Up, Before the Heat
Spring is when cemeteries clear the winter and mowing begins. The flowers that read as spring, how to time the delivery after the clean-up, and the three holidays that fall inside the season.
How it works
The Memorial Page: Where Every Delivery Photo Lives, and How Families Use It
Every BloomBridge delivery adds a photo to a memorial page for the grave. What is on it, who can see it, how to share it with family who cannot travel, and how it works alongside Find a Grave.
What to Put on a Grave
What to Write on the Card With Flowers for a Grave
Short, specific and in your own voice. Messages for a parent, a spouse, a child, a friend's loved one, a birthday, an anniversary and the holidays, with examples you can use as they are or change.
Holidays & Occasions
All Saints' Day, All Souls' Day and Día de los Muertos: Flowers for the Grave in Early November
November 1 and 2 are the days of the dead across the Catholic world and Latin America. The traditions, the flowers (marigolds, chrysanthemums, candles) and how to keep them from far away.
Remembering From Afar
The First Visit to a Grave After the Burial: What to Expect and What to Bring
The first visit back is different from the funeral. What the grave will look like, when the headstone arrives, what to bring, and how to make the visit something you can do again.
What to Put on a Grave
Flowers for a Child's Grave: Gentle Choices and Keeping the Dates
A child's grave is tended differently, and for longer. What parents place, what friends can send, the dates that matter, and how to keep them when the cemetery is far away.
What to Put on a Grave
Flowers for a Grandparent's Grave: Choosing for Grandma and Grandpa
Grandparents' graves are the ones grandchildren inherit. What to place, how to find a grave you have not visited since childhood, and how to share the care across a scattered family.
Cemetery Rules
Flowers for a Mausoleum Crypt or Columbarium Niche: What Fits and What Is Allowed
What a mausoleum crypt and a columbarium niche are, the small vases they have, what size arrangement fits, and the stricter rules of indoor spaces.
Holidays & Occasions
Fourth of July Flowers for a Grave: Patriotic Arrangements That Survive July Heat
The Fourth of July is the summer patriotic holiday at the cemetery. What to place at a grave, flags and red-white-and-blue, and what holds up in the hottest month of the year.
Grave & Headstone Care
How to Choose a Headstone Vase: Built-In, Turning, Staked and What Cemeteries Allow
The vase at a grave decides what flowers can be placed and whether they stay. Built-in turning vases, ground stakes, bronze and granite, sizes, and how to replace one that is missing or broken.
Planning & How-To
How to Create and Manage a Find a Grave Memorial for a Loved One
Find a Grave is the largest public record of American graves. How to search for an existing memorial, create one, add photos and the plot, request a headstone photo, and take over management of a memorial someone else made.
What to Put on a Grave
Jewish Grave Customs: Why Stones Instead of Flowers, and What Is Appropriate to Send
Jewish cemeteries have their own traditions: stones on the grave, the unveiling, yahrzeit, and a general preference against flowers. What visitors and friends should know before sending anything.
Remembering From Afar
Sending Flowers to a Grave for a Friend: When Their Loved One's Grave Is Far From You Both
How to send flowers to the grave of a friend's parent, spouse or child, what information you need, what to write, and why the delivery photo should go to your friend.
Flower Guides
Summer Flowers for a Grave: What Survives Heat, Sun and Weekly Mowing
Summer is the hardest season for grave flowers: full sun, no rain for weeks, and mowers every seven days. The flowers and colors that hold up, and where to place them so they stay.
Remembering From Afar
What to Do With Funeral Flowers After the Service
What to do with funeral flowers after the service: the casket spray, what to leave at the grave, how to dry or press them, and where to give the rest.
Flower Guides
Winter Flowers for a Grave: January to March, After the Wreaths Come Down
The weeks after the holiday clean-up are the emptiest of the year at a cemetery. What to place at a grave in deep winter, what survives snow and freeze, and why it is the easiest season for silk.
Holidays & Occasions
Birthday Flowers for a Grave: Keeping the Day After Someone Is Gone
Marking a birthday at the grave is one of the most common reasons families send flowers. What to choose, what to write, and how to make sure it happens every year.
Remembering From Afar
When You Can't Visit a Grave: Seven Ways to Care for It From Far Away
Distance, health, cost or time keep many people from the graves they care about. Practical ways to tend a grave you cannot get to, from remote flower placement to photos, records and cleaning.
Cemetery Rules
Cemetery Etiquette: How to Visit a Grave Respectfully
Most cemeteries open at dawn and close at dusk, and many lock their gates at night. Cemetery hours, where to walk, what to bring, and how to visit respectfully.
Holidays & Occasions
Easter Flowers for a Grave: Lilies, Spring Color and Cemetery Timing
Easter is the first decoration holiday of the year at most cemeteries. What to place at a grave for Easter, why lilies, and how to time it around the spring clean-up.
Holidays & Occasions
Fall and Thanksgiving Flowers for a Grave: Mums, Harvest Colors and the Fall Clean-Up
Autumn is the season cemeteries look best and the season most graves go bare. What to place for fall and Thanksgiving, why mums, and how to time it around the fall clean-up.
Holidays & Occasions
Father's Day Flowers for a Grave: What to Send and What Holds Up in June
Flowers for Dad's grave on Father's Day: the arrangements families choose, what survives June heat, and how to have them placed if you cannot get there.
Flower Guides
Flower Meanings for a Grave: What Each Flower and Color Says
The flowers most often put on graves, by name: roses, lilies, carnations, chrysanthemums and more, and what each flower and each color means at a grave.
Holidays & Occasions
Flowers on the Anniversary of a Death: What to Send and How to Mark the Day
The best flowers for a death anniversary, from the first year on: which kinds and colors families choose, what to place at the grave, and how to mark the day.
What to Put on a Grave
Grave Decoration Ideas That Cemeteries Actually Allow
Grave decoration ideas for every season and holiday, sorted by what cemeteries allow, tolerate and remove: flags, wreaths, saddles, photos and solar lights.
Flower Guides
How Long Do Flowers Last on a Grave? Fresh, Silk and Potted, Season by Season
Fresh flowers last days at a grave, silk lasts months, potted plants depend on the season. Realistic timelines by material and weather, and how to make any of them last longer.
Grave & Headstone Care
How to Clean a Headstone Safely: What to Use and What Will Ruin It
Water, a soft brush and patience clean most headstones. Bleach, wire brushes and pressure washers destroy them. A safe method for granite, marble and bronze, and when to call a professional.
Planning & How-To
How to Find a Grave in a Cemetery: Records, Find a Grave and Reading a Plot Map
Find the grave online first with Find a Grave, the VA gravesite locator and cemetery records, then use the section, lot and plot map to walk straight to it.
Veterans & Military Honors
Memorial Day Flowers for a Grave: Traditions, Flags and What Cemeteries Allow
How families honor a grave on Memorial Day, what national cemeteries allow that weekend, the flag rules, and when to have flowers placed so they are there for the holiday.
Holidays & Occasions
Mother's Day Flowers for a Grave: Ideas, Timing and What Lasts
Mother's Day is the busiest day of the year at cemeteries. Here is what to place at Mom's grave, when to have it delivered, and how to make it last through May.
Flower Guides
Silk vs Fresh Flowers for a Grave: An Honest Comparison
Fresh flowers are beautiful and gone in days. Silk lasts a season. When each one is the right choice for a grave, what cemeteries think, and why placed-for-you flowers are almost always silk.
Remembering From Afar
A Sympathy Gift After the Funeral: What to Send When the Flowers Have Stopped
The hardest weeks of grief come after the funeral, when the support fades. Thoughtful sympathy gifts for a month, three months or a year later, including flowers placed at the grave.
Holidays & Occasions
Valentine's Day Flowers for a Grave: Roses for a Spouse Who Is Gone
For a widow or widower, Valentine's Day is one of the hardest dates. What to place at a spouse's grave, why silk roses in February, and how families support a grieving parent that week.
Veterans & Military Honors
Veterans Day Flowers for a Grave: Honoring Service on November 11
Veterans Day honors everyone who served. What to place at a veteran's grave on November 11, the national cemetery window, and how it differs from Memorial Day.
Veterans & Military Honors
Flowers at a Veteran's Grave: National Cemetery Rules, Windows and What to Send
VA national cemetery flower rules, from DFW to Great Lakes: fresh flowers any day, artificial flowers only on each cemetery's own dates, no glass.
Holidays & Occasions
Wedding Anniversary Flowers at a Grave: Keeping the Date After Losing a Spouse
The wedding anniversary is the date a widow or widower marks most privately. How to place flowers at a spouse's grave for it, what to choose, and how children can help.
Flower Guides
The Best Flowers for a Grave: What Lasts and What to Choose
Fresh or silk, roses or hydrangeas, bright or soft: a practical guide to choosing flowers for a grave that will still look cared for weeks later.
Planning & How-To
Can You Have Flowers Delivered to a Grave?
Yes. Here is how graveside flower delivery works, who actually places the flowers, what it costs compared with a florist, and how you know they arrived.
Cemetery Rules
Cemetery Flower Rules: What You Can Leave at a Grave, and When It Gets Removed
What you can leave at a grave, which flowers and vases cemeteries allow, when crews clear everything, and how to leave flowers so they stay.
Holidays & Occasions
Christmas Flowers for a Grave: What to Send and When to Order
How families decorate a grave for the holidays, what cemeteries allow in December, and when to order so the flowers are there in time.
Grave & Headstone Care
Headstone Saddle or Ground Vase? How to Pick the Right Grave Arrangement
Saddles sit across the top of an upright headstone. Vase arrangements go beside a flat marker or into a built-in vase. Here is how to choose for the grave you have.
BloomBridge News
Podcast: Celebrating 200 Episodes with Kristen Allen of BloomBridge (Episode 200)
For its 200th episode, September 2024, The Ordinary, Extraordinary Cemetery podcast brought back BloomBridge founder Kristen Allen: growth since 2021, connections across the country, and a delivery to Marie Laveau's tomb in New Orleans.
BloomBridge News
Find a Grave News: "Connecting with Those Who Served"
Find a Grave told the story of a daughter on active duty who sent flowers to her veteran father's grave through BloomBridge, and the Runner, a veteran herself, who brought her Vietnam-veteran father along to place them.
BloomBridge News
BloomBridge and Find a Grave: The Flower Delivery Button on Every U.S. Memorial
Find a Grave added a Flower Delivery button to memorials for burials in the United States. It brings you to BloomBridge with the grave location already filled in. How the partnership came about and how it works.
BloomBridge News
Podcast: The Ordinary, Extraordinary Cemetery Celebrates 100 Episodes (Episode 100)
The Ordinary, Extraordinary Cemetery podcast marked its 100th episode in September 2022 with a look back at its favorite stories and guests, BloomBridge founder Kristen Allen among them.
BloomBridge News
Podcast: BloomBridge Update with Founder Kristen Allen (Episode 61)
Eight months after launch, Kristen Allen returns to The Ordinary, Extraordinary Cemetery podcast, December 2021, with an update on how BloomBridge's graveside flower delivery was going and how to become a Runner.
BloomBridge News
Podcast: A Visit with Kristen Allen, Founder of BloomBridge (Episode 28)
Kristen Allen's first appearance on The Ordinary, Extraordinary Cemetery podcast, April 2021: the promise to her grandmother that started BloomBridge, and how a graveside delivery works.